


Asphyxiation

by KesoKeos



Series: Keso’s Haikyuu One Shots [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Flowers, Flowers bloom on the skin of the person you love, Hanahaki Disease, Kei doesn’t have any, M/M, hanahaki, the bokuaka is only mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-29
Updated: 2020-06-29
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:54:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,667
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24980401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KesoKeos/pseuds/KesoKeos
Summary: Asphyxiation - the state or process of being deprived of oxygen, which can result in unconsciousness or death; suffocation.Kei had accepted his fate; he loved Tetsurou, yet his own skin remained blank.
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei
Series: Keso’s Haikyuu One Shots [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1832602
Comments: 7
Kudos: 161





	Asphyxiation

(TW:Blood, but just like the normal hanahaki stuff)

“Have you ever heard of asphyxiation, Tetsurou?” 

Kuroo looked up from adoring his hands, tan skin covered in a mesmerising assortment of flowers in warm hues. Hazel eyes met brown, only for a moment, before Kei glanced out the window at the coffee shop. A light rain was falling outside, grey skies transforming the world into one of dull tones and saturated greenery. 

“I can’t say that I have, but it certainly sounds beautiful.” 

Compared to the cold of the outside world, the shop was warm, but it was nothing compared to the dark haired male’s voice. Smooth and deep, holding a fond warmth in it as he spoke. 

The fondness was something Kei cherished, but he knew it wasn’t the one he longed for. His own creamy skin was blank, not a single flower or bud having bloomed. They probably never would, and even if they did there was no guarantee it would fix any of his problems. The blond laughed bitterly, glancing back at Kuroo to find that wonderful, charming smile looking back up at him. Smiles wouldn’t save him, but just for the sake of it, Kei smiled back.

“I agree, it’s truly alluring to think about. It‘s just such a shame that such a beautiful word has such a cruel meaning.” His voice was thick, and he had to take a few deep breaths just to calm himself. He wouldn’t make it, not if he stayed there. Their conversation had been a short one anyway, just a passing greeting in the coffee shop as Kei picked up his order. If he left, it wouldn’t be odd, not when everyone that knew Kei knew Tuesday’s were busy.

And so, leaving the other male with something to think over, Tsukishima walked away, out into the rain and out of sight. He managed to slip into the alleyway just as he began to cough up six bloody flowers. It hurt, the back of his throat burning with each new one, but it didn’t take too long until the process was complete. Each one was different, each one was beautiful, and each one belonged to a flower that was painted onto Tetsurou’s skin. 

From the moment Kei was born, his skin had been a blank canvas, as was everyone’s. It wasn’t until someone fell truly, deeply in love with you that the flowers would begin to bloom. The flowers signified true love, and simple infatuation or even a crush didn’t suffice; it had to be love. 

Not once had Kei ever had a flower bud — let alone one that was in bloom — on his skin. 

He was twenty three, so it wasn’t exactly unnatural for such an occurrence. Not everyone fell in love by then, nor did everyone find someone that truly loved them. No, the part that was odd was the flowers that grew inside of his body. His condition was completely unheard of aside from in myths and legends. The doctors, at a stump for the reason why flowers bloomed inside of his body instead of on his skin, labeled it hanahaki. Mere stories that teenagers often wrote about, a figure of fiction. 

The weekly doctor’s appointments were on Tuesdays, but that morning it had gone rather quickly. It was more of a check up now, as there wasn’t anything he could do about the flowers without surgery that had never been heard of, that likely wouldn’t even fix the problem and would kill him if anything went wrong. There were suggestions on how it could theoretically work out, but Kei wasn’t going to take the risk. 

“Asphyxiation, that is what is likely to happen at one point if your condition worsens.” That is what the doctor had told him months ago, that is where he had learned of the word. He’d been thinking about it a lot lately.

That was Tsukishima Kei’s fate, because he was in love with Kuroo Tetsurou. They had lost touch after Kei’s first year of highschool, back when his feelings were merely a crush and Tetsurou’s skin was also unblemished. It was a chance meeting a few years later in the very same coffee shop they had been in that morning, but that one day, that one conversation had sealed his fate. The more time Kei spent with Kuroo, the deeper his feelings grew, until one day flowers began to bloom on the other’s skin. 

There were six kinds, all of which Kei knew the name of but didn’t bother to find the meaning of. Or, more correctly, he hadn’t bothered remembering the meaning. What use was there obsessing over something like meaning, when those flowers would be the death of him? For as Tsukishima fell more and more in love, they continued to bloom and grow, bright and vivid on the other male’s skin. The flowers had been a permanent addition on his skin for a few years now, and Tetsurou absolutely adored them even if he was completely oblivious as to who they were from.

Kei knew, and so did Keiji and Koutarou, their own bodies covered in blues, purples and whites, gifted to each other with the love they shared. They knew that Kei loved Tetsurou deeply, or else there wouldn’t have been so many kinds of flowers, nor would they have covered so much of the man’s tan skin. They knew that Kuroo didn’t love him back, because after all of this time Kei’s skin was perfectly creamy and smooth and devoid of any flowers. They did not know what began a year ago, when those exact same flowers — at first only petals — began to bloom inside of him and make there way out after any interactions with the love of his life. 

Luckily for him, Tetsurou didn’t have anyone he was in a relationship with, meaning it was likely things progressed slower. Fate was cruel like that, dragging out his life longer. It was becoming harder and harder to dodge interactions with him, to find excuses to get away before the flowers came. Tuesday’s were always nice like that, they gave him the freedom to be alone. 

Sighing, Kei began to try and clean up, taking out a handkerchief to wipe his mouth from the blood. The rain had begun to fall harder, saving him the trouble of wetting the fabric, but at the same time seeping through his clothes. The flowers lay in a small pile on the floor, the rain washing off some of the blood. 

“A shame something so beautiful could be so cruel, huh?” he asked himself, voice barely audible because of the pain in his throat. After a moments thought, he gently picked each flower up, delicately placing them into the handkerchief and watching as the blood further ruined the cloth.

They truly were wonderful, and that was why he kept them. Each flower was a piece of him, a piece of his love for Tetsurou, even if that love wasn’t reciprocated. There was no way he could stop this from happening, and so for him, there was no use confessing. He’d much rather spend the rest of his days with Kuroo, having happy memories to cherish, then ruining everything and dying with that pain in his heart.

It was about time he got some more, anyways, the ones at home from the day prior were just starting to wither. Kei liked to see them as the outpouring of his love, too much for the skin to handle, so he began to make them as well. It was a much nicer version of the story, and it brought him some form of comfort in knowing that he had proof of his love. Standing up, he continued to hold the flowers, admiring them similarly to how Kuroo had been admiring the ones printed vibrantly onto his skin. It didn’t matter that it was wet and cold, and any sounds of passerby’s were drowned out by the rain and his disconnect to the world. 

If he was really being hopeful, he liked to believe that he had some rare condition, where Kuroo did love him and the flowers simply grew instead of appearing on his skin. Today was one of those days; standing in an alleyway in the wet, holding bloodied flowers, while he rest of the world went past him. He could dream, couldn’t he? If it made Kei’s last moments any less painful, then he would rather fool himself into believing a beautiful lie rather than admitting to the painful truth. Just for a moment, Kei wanted the flowers to be his cruel yet beautiful story, rather than the asphyxia. 

Just for a moment, he fooled himself, and he found himself content. No pain, no joy, just Kei and the flowers without any overwhelming emotions or baggage along with it. An umbrella dropped onto the floor, but he payed no mind to it.

Seconds later, a hand was on top of his, and another had gone and picked up one of the plants he was holding in the pile. The skin was tan, covered in a mixture of yellow, red, orange, pink, magenta and white flowers, all mesmerising and a perfect match to the five Kei continued to hold. 

He felt the warmth of another body pressed against his back, the sensation of a breath on his neck, and even without turning his head he knew it was Tetsurou standing behind him. Glancing at the man anyway, he saw the wonder and hurt in those hazel eyes, and before he knew it, he was coughing out more petals. It wasn’t as bad as the flowers, they were smaller and the blood that dotted them was only from the back of his throat, from where he’d been hurt earlier. Kei didn’t know what to say, he didn’t know what to do, because the secret he’d been fighting to keep for so long had been discovered by exactly the person he didn’t want to know.

Even as Tetsurou moved to be facing Kei, he kept his hand close to the blond’s, lingering. Their hands lost contact, and instead the warmth and tenderness of his touch on his cheek instead.

The petals having stopped for now, Kei felt his head being tilted upwards to face the dark haired male, and once again their eyes met. The sound of the rain was no longer audible, and he saw nothing but the man in front of him, whose dark hair was plastered to his forehead because of the wet. He always did like Kuroo’s bed hair, and just his hair in general, not that he would ever be able to tell him that. And then, the words that he never expected to hear.

“I’ve liked you for a long time now, you know,” Kei heard the other whisper, his voice quiet, still just as warm, but hesitant. “I was too afraid to believe that these could be from you, especially when you stopped spending time with me like you used to. I was afraid that if I let myself love you, and these flowers weren’t from you, that I would be hurting whoever loved me so deeply that all of these flowers bloomed on my skin. I’m an idiot, and I should have seen it sooner, because instead of making things better for you I made it all worse.”

He wanted to answer, he really did, but that simply wasn’t possible. Kei felt his breath hitch, and his throat burn, and the familiar sensation of flowers welling up from inside of him. He pulled away, trying to protect Kuroo from having to see him, because he knew that this one would be the worst yet. His body began to heat up and then feel extremely cold, and as his knees buckled and he doubled over, more flowers and blood made their way out of his mouth and onto the concrete of the alleyway. Briefly, he wondered if this was what asphyxiation felt like.

He couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t find a way to make it all stop. It hurt, his mind filled with thoughts of the man he loved, but not actually being with him their in reality. Somewhere distant, he heard Tetsurou calling his name, but he couldn’t keep his eyes open. His skin was an odd colour, but that must have been his imagination, seeming as his vision blurred and nothing seemed to make sense. From deep within the chaos, it all turned to static, and then to blankness. 

Life certainly was cruel, tearing him away from Tetsurou as soon as they’d came across such a revelation.

There was nothing.

And then, what seemed like moments later, there was everything. 

There was a vague awareness of the world, but mostly things around him seemed numb. It was like this for a while, he didn’t understand how long, until things began to clear up somewhat and he felt his train of thought become more coherent. Afraid of what he might see, Kei didn’t open his eyes, instead attempting to interpret his surroundings through his other senses. He didn’t quite remember what had happened, just fuzzy bits and pieces from that Tuesday morning, memories of flowers and blood and the word asphyxia. 

Wherever he was, it was cold, aside from the warmth that enveloped one of his hands. Weakly, he managed to move his fingers a little, brushing his thumb over what appeared to be skin. 

Moments later, a voice, deep and smooth and warm as it had always been. One so familiar and one that he had loved for so long, one that held hope and worry and seemed to hold the one thing he’d yearned for; love. “Kei? Love, are you awake?”

Slowly, he opened his eyes, finding that the room wasn’t overly bright as he’d thought it might have been. Looking over to the source of the voice, he saw none other than Kuroo Tetsurou himself, smiling fondly at him. Their eyes met, hazel and golden-brown, and then before he knew it Kei was close to Tetsurou once more. Even though he was still lying down, body weak and stiff and unable to return the action, he had been brought into a hug. 

As that happened, he felt a warmth spread across his body, one that was strangely comforting and pleasant. It moved from his heart to the tips of his fingers and the ends of his toes, the complete opposite of how he’d felt whenever the flowers began to grow inside.

The other male pulled away after a few moments, placing a feather light kiss to his cheek before simply sitting on the edge of the bed Kei was resting on. The blond looked up at Tetsurou, and then glanced to his hand that was still being held by him. It didn’t take long at all for him to see, the multitudes of dark blue flowers trailing up his arm, accompanied by some that looked to be silver and gold. He couldn’t really see it clearly without his glasses, but even he could tell that the plants that had bloomed across his skin were exquisite; unlike any that Kei had ever beheld. 

He looked back up to Tetsurou, starting to remember more of what happened. If he had these flowers, then that could only mean one thing, but he was hesitant to believe that it could possibly be true. His throat was sore, and he knew he couldn’t form the words, but with one look Tetsurou understood, sealing the promise with a kiss.

“I love you, Kei.”

His words were not asphyxia, they were not beautiful but cruel. They were the truth, a wonderful, joyful truth. Kei smiled, weakly squeezing his hand. The flowers on Tetsurou’s skin became ever more vibrant at the touch, and the silver and gold ones on Kei’s shimmered just like stars. There was no need for words at the moment, because the meaning was all too clear.

**Author's Note:**

> Have a sort of angsty one shot because I needed a break from writing my main story and I wanted to write KuroTsuki
> 
> Edit: In regards to the flowers, I didn’t try to base them off actual flowers, so I unfortunately cannot give you meanings for them (but they’d all be very nice things because Tsukki loves Kuroo a lot). I wanted the flowers themselves to be the representation of the love they have, rather than the meaning of the flowers. Kuroo’s flowers are all warm colours, and they represent how Tsukishima always sees him as having this warmth, and Tsukishima’s are kind of like the night sky (and I didn’t mention this because I couldn’t figure out how, but there’s white and silvery ones in a circle on his back that look like the moon) since Kuroo sees him as breathtaking, gentle and as someone who is caring in his own way (which is why he’s got the moon, which provides light but not as obviously and brightly as opposed to the sun).


End file.
